why is it so hard to find multicultural toys?

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As a teacher in South Texas - where my middle school of 1600 students had 3 white kids and 6 Filipino kids and the rest Hispanic - I saw the results of being isolated in your own culture. I was an outsider. Many of my students had never met a black person and thought it was acceptable to refer to my black program director as "the n***** who came to watch you teach."

They had no clue that they were using a bad word, having only the context of rap music to educate them on black culture.

 Now we live in a predominately white area of town and go to a mostly white church. That makes it a bit more difficult to ensure that our children are educated about other cultures through real-life interactions and not just external media. To that end, we made a point to find a school that (a) taught a foreign language daily, (b) had a diverse population in which the achievement gap between white and non-white students and between economically disadvantaged (E.D.) and Not E.D. students was lower than average for our area, and (c) included children with special needs in their population. For us, those were our most important criteria in choosing a school.

Our family's life verse is Micah 6:8:  
He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?
In fact, here's a sneak peek at two shirts that we'll be selling soon to raise adoption funds...


More details to come soon on pre-ordering yours... plus one more design based on Proverbs 3:27, which will include kid sizes too!

To us, we're not doing justice or loving kindness or walking humbly with God when we support a system that lacks equity in educational opportunities across racial, socioeconomic, and disability categories.

When we first considered educational options for our kids, including the early learning environment in our home, we were white parents (still are!) to two white children (still have them, but have added our little one from Taiwan and are in the process of adding three more from Uganda). So when we were expecting Jocelyn's birth, we tried to find a range of multicultural toys for her at consignment sales and online. We wanted the beautiful hues of skin God has created introduced early and often, normalized in one way by her daily playthings.

And? 

I was disappointed by the few options available at mainstream retailers, who usually carry a wide assortment of dolls and books and toys with my skin color but just a token few with any darker tones.

It's gotten better, but I still have to go out of my way to find products that are multiethnic, especially ones that reflect the varying shades now (and soon to be) represented in our own family. Tomorrow I'll be starting a series of posts on my favorite multicultural toys (including a couple giveaways from my friends at Hearts for Hearts dolls; CLICK HERE to go to their Facebook page, because liking it will be good for one entry in the giveaway!).

Please, please, please leave a comment if you have a multicultural toy or book or resource recommendation for me! I'd love to include more in this blog series (and check them out for my own colorful family).

I'm not uncomfortable with the psalms of lament. {Actually, I'm encouraged by them.}

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Our pastors are preaching through a series on Ruth right now. We're about to get to chapter four, which is where we find the good stuff we like: a wedding. a birth. redemption. promise. hope.

During the sermon on Ruth 1 a couple weeks ago (which I would HIGHLY recommend; here's the link), Brian Frost admitted that we prefer the stories in Ruth 4 over the ones in Ruth 1. We like celebrations; we avoid mourning. I've noticed too that we love to quote psalms of praise and thanksgiving and wisdom, but the psalms of lament? 

Sometimes we treat those like they aren't from the same inerrant Bible as the happier ones.

My friends, the Bible - and life - is not all thanksgiving and Ruth 4. Sometimes it's lament and Ruth 1.

We like to be chipper and cheery, but sometimes our pithy responses sound like, "Screw you and your pain," to those who are hurting. Sometimes the cliches feel less like encouragement and more like a sucker punch.

I know most folks mean well, but sometimes I wonder: if Jesus's lament from the cross, "My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?" had been posted on Facebook, how many people would have replied "Chin up, buddy!" or "This too shall pass" or "I know you're in pain now, but it'll be all fine in a few days. Hang in there!"

{Is it sinful that I just chuckled at the unintended pun of saying "hang in there" to our God on the cross? Forgive me.}

"Look on the bright side" doesn't respond to a mother's exhaustion when her daughter with autism tries to escape from the house every night, not understanding the danger of her actions. "There's a light at the end of the tunnel" doesn't help the parent wondering what the future will be for her son with Down syndrome or the dad taking his son home from the hospital without any firm answers for the fifteenth time. "One day at a time" isn't comforting to adoptive parents who know their child is sick but who must wait out the legal process before bringing him home to needed medical care. And "tough times don't last, but tough people do" is a slap in the face to the missionary fighting bureaucratic red tape just to get on a plane to mourn her father's unexpected death in the US while she faithfully poured into others in Taiwan. 

Those are just a sampling of my friends' circumstances in the past week. 

I'm not sure what the point of this post is, other than to say this: Our theology is incomplete if we only celebrate and never mourn. We've edited out huge chunks of scripture when we encourage people to live their best lives now. We're creating idols if we worship miraculous healings rather than the Healer who sometimes, for reasons all His own, chooses not to heal us on this side of heaven.

Pictures like the one below make our lives look perfect.


You probably already realize this, but that picture? It was the best shot. And even then, it was edited. Our photographer made us look good.

That's great for photography, but not so great for theology. We don't have to cover up our bruises and hide our imperfections and sugarcoat our real pain when we stand before Christ or before fellow saints in His bride, the church. 

Let's be real with one another, setting aside the trite pseudo-encouragements and Photoshopped conversations that we'd prefer. 

Come as you are. If you're mourning or lamenting, you have good company among me and my friends... and among the writers God used to author the Bible. 

meet Pluto! {she's no NV, but I like her better}

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We named her Pluto, because she's only slightly smaller than a planet.


See the little black circles on the bumper? They're back-up sensors. If you live in Raleigh, you'll be glad I have those.


As huge as she is, she's only a foot longer than Lee's work Suburban. I drive that just fine, so this isn't as intimidating as I thought it would be.


The cockpit (okay, maybe it's just the driver's seat, but given the size of Pluto, I think "cockpit" works)  is just like other 15-passenger Ford E350s.


But the back? Nope.


Forget most of the benches, and instead you get captain's chairs with one bench in the back for seating for 10.

In case you're wondering, the plan - using the picture above - is for Zoe to be front left, one of the big girls to be front right, the other big girl to be middle left, Patricia to be middle right, and the boys to be on the bench in the back.



The current bench could move back and we could add the spare bench - a three seater that will probably live in the attic - where the current bench is. We don't need for the vehicle to seat 13, though, and I like my cargo space, so we're keeping it as it is.


I have no idea how this picture is useful, but our friend Chad might like it, so here you go. Chad will also care that it's a 2011, that has 47,000 miles on it, and that it's not a Mercedes (though he already figured out that last one, I'm sure.)


And, yes, for the first time ever, the Dingle crew has a DVD player in the car. I know we've done a couple road trips to South Texas, one to Nashville, a few to Florida, and a handful of others, but we tend to go low-tech when roadtripping. I'd rather not have the screen, but the price and everything else about Pluto worked for us, so I'm okay with it. If you're in the market, here's the place where we found ours; they usually have a good selection at the best prices and with the best features I've seen.

The cost was considerably less than the NV, and I like the set-up of this better, so it's a win all around.

Plus, another win: no more "what kind of vehicle should we get?" conversations and Facebook posts now that Pluto has joined the family!

our front-row seats

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In the midst of all the fundraising, I didn't get around to posting about our anniversary on the 18th.


In hindsight, a carnival wedding reception was the most fitting way to start our lives together. We certainly haven't followed other norms since then.

I guess we just don't do "conventional" too well.

Wild. Unexpected. Passionate. Unorthodox. Occasionally frenetic. All with a dash of crazy.

We're good at all that, dadgum it!

In eight years, our marriage has been nothing like we expected or planned.

It's been so much more wonderful than that.

Through every startling deviation from our own plans, God has shown up in surprising ways. Through the circumstances we never would have chosen on our own, He has offered front-row seats to amazing demonstrations of His glory and goodness in our lives.

Like the front row seats we've gotten in the past week.

Friends and strangers ate waffle fries and fried chicken and milkshakes with us at Chick-fil-A. They bought raffle tickets or paid to spin the wheel o' CFA prizes. More friends and strangers bid on items throughout the week. Some gave donations directly. Others helped spread the word about our auction. A few prayed with us over the grants we're waiting to hear about.

And have you noticed it yet?

The fundraising thermometer on the right?

Yep, it read $14,850 yesterday.

Today? After $550 in funds raised through meals and raffles at Chick-fil-A and the $3279.50 raised in the auction (if you won a bid, I'll be in touch today or tomorrow)  and another $3000 we were able to contribute ourselves through recent sacrifices we've made, the total is higher. Much higher.

We've passed the halfway mark for our fundraising to bring Patience, Philip, and Patreesa out of their orphanage and into our family.

We have $21,650.

And we have front-row seats to yet another of God's amazing demonstrations of His glory and goodness in our lives. 

Thank you to each of you to joined us in person, through prayer, or by bids or donations. 

Welcome to the front row with us. We don't know yet where the remaining $18,000 will come from, but we can guarantee that we're all in for an awesome show!