your daily dose of Zoe
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These shots are from tummy time last Tuesday. I think she's gained a pound since then. (Seriously.)
9 months!
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This is the first celebration of Zoe's birth that she's been home for.
We didn't even know she existed until after her first, second, and third month birthdays had passed.
We hoped we'd have her home before her seventh or eighth month birthdays happened, but that didn't work out.
So today, her nine month birthday, is special to me. It's the first celebration of her birth in which we've all been together.
She has decided she loves her minky, just like big sister. (And, no, that's not big sister's minky, but our friend Heather used the same fabric... after Jocelyn saw it in a fabric bin while she was staying with Aunt Heather and Uncle Neal while we were in Taiwan. As soon as big sis saw it, Heather wasn't given a choice about Zoe's silky side.)
You would have to know where her IV had been in her feet to find the faint scars now. She was in and out of the hospital lots - including one long stay in June and another in July - and needed more than one IV each time because the first one came out, so she also has some faint IV scars on her hands.
She only has one mongolian spot. What's that, you say? Well, see that spot that looks like a faint bruise in the top right corner of the picture above? It's a kind of birthmark that a lot of Asian babies have. They often occur on babies' bottoms, so parents of children with big or otherwise obvious spots have to have them documented by a pediatrician to avoid allegations of abuse by childcare workers who (rightfully) question what looks like widespread bruising.
She's teething. Hardcore. I can feel several bumps in there during the frequent moments when she uses my fingers as teething toys. (Teething toys, though? Not interested.)
She will, however, chew on her paci and even turn it sideways, as in the picture above, to do so more aggressively.
She is a super sleeper, going for 10-12 hour stretches at night (with an occasional whimper for us to put her pacifier back in, but she sleeps through that) and then napping a couple times a day for 1-2 hours each. Except for today, when the teething pain made it two catnaps in the morning and one (hopefully long) nap in the afternoon, which just began twenty minutes ago.
She likes the crib just fine, but otherwise she does not think she should ever be put down. She'll accept it - though not happily - if she can see people nearby, but we're doing well if we can get to stay content for 15 minutes in a swing, bouncy seat, or Bumbo before she is done. All this holding has helped her bond to us quickly, though, so it's a blessing! (Plus she is decidedly pro-carrier - namely our Peanut Shell pouch sling or our Ergo - which helps.)
She loves her siblings, tolerates the dog, is intrigued by the cat, and has settled into the household quite well.
Oh, and oddly enough our sweet girl from a warm climate hates heat. We'll see come winter how she feels about cold.
Happy nine months, sweet Zoe Amanda!
We didn't even know she existed until after her first, second, and third month birthdays had passed.
We hoped we'd have her home before her seventh or eighth month birthdays happened, but that didn't work out.
So today, her nine month birthday, is special to me. It's the first celebration of her birth in which we've all been together.
She has decided she loves her minky, just like big sister. (And, no, that's not big sister's minky, but our friend Heather used the same fabric... after Jocelyn saw it in a fabric bin while she was staying with Aunt Heather and Uncle Neal while we were in Taiwan. As soon as big sis saw it, Heather wasn't given a choice about Zoe's silky side.)
You would have to know where her IV had been in her feet to find the faint scars now. She was in and out of the hospital lots - including one long stay in June and another in July - and needed more than one IV each time because the first one came out, so she also has some faint IV scars on her hands.
She only has one mongolian spot. What's that, you say? Well, see that spot that looks like a faint bruise in the top right corner of the picture above? It's a kind of birthmark that a lot of Asian babies have. They often occur on babies' bottoms, so parents of children with big or otherwise obvious spots have to have them documented by a pediatrician to avoid allegations of abuse by childcare workers who (rightfully) question what looks like widespread bruising.
She's teething. Hardcore. I can feel several bumps in there during the frequent moments when she uses my fingers as teething toys. (Teething toys, though? Not interested.)
She will, however, chew on her paci and even turn it sideways, as in the picture above, to do so more aggressively.
She is a super sleeper, going for 10-12 hour stretches at night (with an occasional whimper for us to put her pacifier back in, but she sleeps through that) and then napping a couple times a day for 1-2 hours each. Except for today, when the teething pain made it two catnaps in the morning and one (hopefully long) nap in the afternoon, which just began twenty minutes ago.
She likes the crib just fine, but otherwise she does not think she should ever be put down. She'll accept it - though not happily - if she can see people nearby, but we're doing well if we can get to stay content for 15 minutes in a swing, bouncy seat, or Bumbo before she is done. All this holding has helped her bond to us quickly, though, so it's a blessing! (Plus she is decidedly pro-carrier - namely our Peanut Shell pouch sling or our Ergo - which helps.)
She loves her siblings, tolerates the dog, is intrigued by the cat, and has settled into the household quite well.
Oh, and oddly enough our sweet girl from a warm climate hates heat. We'll see come winter how she feels about cold.
Happy nine months, sweet Zoe Amanda!
Fridays from the Families:: Vacation Bible School for our Special Needs Son
/Sandra is a friend, pastor's wife, and momma who has guest blogged here in the past and whose e-book I gave away a few months ago. Now she's back with a helpful post about special needs and VBS! Thanks for letting me share your words once again, Sandra.
One evening last summer, I dropped of off one of my boys at Vacation Bible School and drove away with my younger son still in the backseat. Tears filled my eyes as I lined up with the other cars leaving the parking lot. Those parents could just drop off their kids and leave. Those parents didn't didn't have an autistic son who didn't fit in with his peers. A son still wearing diapers, who couldn't sit still for story time, who covered his ears during song time, and who stole Goldfish crackers from the other kids when they turned their backs on their snacks. So that son and I went home.
One of the hardest things about being a special needs parent is realizing all the ways your child is different from other kids his age. Most days, I don't think much about it. He is who he is and we love him. But when we go somewhere and he just doesn't fit, when there isn't a place for him, it's hard not to get upset for him.
This year, we took both of our boys to Vacation Bible School. Our older son David ran off to join his class. Our younger son James met his teacher and his helper at the door. The teacher had already collected information about James like his dietary restrictions, his favorites things to do, and his tendency to put things in this mouth that aren't food. She welcomed him excitedly and introduced him to his helper. I could drive away just like the other parents, knowing that James would be taken care of and have fun.
James's preschool special needs class had activities on his level. His teacher (who is an occupational therapist) created a sensory room for the kids. His class joined the other preschool class for game time and for some of the singing time. We had special needs kids in the older classes who had full time helpers with them. They were there to help or take the child out if necessary.
What a difference one year made for my family! We are so thankful for the hard work so many of our church members put in to make sure every child was comfortable and included.
How does your church ministry to families of special needs kids during Vacation Bible School?
Sandra is a pastor's wife and mom of two boys, in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. She is the author of Speechless: Finding God's Grace in My Son's Autism. You can find out more on the book's Facebook page, Speechless by Sandra.
potential special needs diagnoses for our Zoe girl
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The diagnoses we're working through for our girl are ASD and PVL.
(No, not Autism Spectrum Disorder... the other ASD: Atrial Septal Defect. And PVL? That's periventricular leukomalacia. Mad props to me for being able to spell that without help this time!)
So what does that mean? Well, in simplest terms, she has small hole-like areas of damage in her brain and a hole in her heart, if her medical records from Taiwan are accurate (and we have no reason to question them at this point). Neither seem to be causing any immediate medical problems, but we may be looking at therapies and surgeries and more specialist appointments to give her the best outcomes possible, and we'll keep y'all posted as we walk that path.
A sweet woman at church on Sunday - a woman who I had seen before but never spoken to in length - oohed and aahed over Zoe. She asked her name, and her county, and the number of days we had been home. Every question was genuine and well-intentioned, if not always tactful.
And then the big question came: And she's healthy?
We've had Zoe for less than a week, but it's been long enough for me to catch on that this sweet woman thought she knew the answer. Zoe is breathtakingly beautiful and loves watching the world around her. People have actually said, "Are you sure she has special needs? She looks too pretty," as if disability and beauty can't coexist. I could have just said, "yes, she's healthy," like she expected, and that answer would have been partially honest, because she is so much healthier now than she was when we met her in the cramped Taiwanese hospital prayer room exact one week ago.
I forced the full truth, as we know it, out instead: "Well, she was a preemie, and MRIs shows areas of brain injury, and her heart might have a defect. We're sorting through all of that."
She kept saying, "WOW," over and over, and then added, "and you took all that on?"
I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded.
To us, we're getting Zoe. I guess that means we're taking all that - ASD and PVL and any other alphabet soup that comes our way - on. We do, after all, have a cardiology appointment on the books (August 2) and a neurology one a'coming (update: it's August 2 as well), but that's just the reality of getting to parent our precious baby girl.
Getting to. It's a privilege.
We're not superheroes or martyrs or saviors in doing this. We may have been obedient in responding to God's call for us to adopt, but we are disobedient in a hundred different ways each day. The rough day we had a couple days ago was more the result of our sin than the challenges of transition. Yesterday, I ate the remnants of a bag of Doritos for breakfast and washed it down with a Diet Coke. I've been opting to watch Dawson's Creek on Netflix instead of unpacking, so most of our bags are still piled on the floor of our bedroom. We returned home last Thursday morning, and I've only had two showers - maybe three? - since then. (It's even grosser when you consider that our big kids have had a stomach bug this week, so try not to think about that.) Earlier today, I considered going to Wal-Mart to buy more underwear so that I could put off the laundry for another day. Later today, as I rest in bed with my turn with the stomach bug, I'll be catching up on my trashy TV by watching The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All on Hulu (and still not unpacking).
In other words, we're not perfect.
We're just riding this wild ride God set us on in parenting our two homegrown kiddos and our one Taiwanese treasure. Thanks for continuing to pray for us.
(No, not Autism Spectrum Disorder... the other ASD: Atrial Septal Defect. And PVL? That's periventricular leukomalacia. Mad props to me for being able to spell that without help this time!)
So what does that mean? Well, in simplest terms, she has small hole-like areas of damage in her brain and a hole in her heart, if her medical records from Taiwan are accurate (and we have no reason to question them at this point). Neither seem to be causing any immediate medical problems, but we may be looking at therapies and surgeries and more specialist appointments to give her the best outcomes possible, and we'll keep y'all posted as we walk that path.
A sweet woman at church on Sunday - a woman who I had seen before but never spoken to in length - oohed and aahed over Zoe. She asked her name, and her county, and the number of days we had been home. Every question was genuine and well-intentioned, if not always tactful.
And then the big question came: And she's healthy?
We've had Zoe for less than a week, but it's been long enough for me to catch on that this sweet woman thought she knew the answer. Zoe is breathtakingly beautiful and loves watching the world around her. People have actually said, "Are you sure she has special needs? She looks too pretty," as if disability and beauty can't coexist. I could have just said, "yes, she's healthy," like she expected, and that answer would have been partially honest, because she is so much healthier now than she was when we met her in the cramped Taiwanese hospital prayer room exact one week ago.
I forced the full truth, as we know it, out instead: "Well, she was a preemie, and MRIs shows areas of brain injury, and her heart might have a defect. We're sorting through all of that."
She kept saying, "WOW," over and over, and then added, "and you took all that on?"
I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded.
To us, we're getting Zoe. I guess that means we're taking all that - ASD and PVL and any other alphabet soup that comes our way - on. We do, after all, have a cardiology appointment on the books (August 2) and a neurology one a'coming (update: it's August 2 as well), but that's just the reality of getting to parent our precious baby girl.
Getting to. It's a privilege.
We're not superheroes or martyrs or saviors in doing this. We may have been obedient in responding to God's call for us to adopt, but we are disobedient in a hundred different ways each day. The rough day we had a couple days ago was more the result of our sin than the challenges of transition. Yesterday, I ate the remnants of a bag of Doritos for breakfast and washed it down with a Diet Coke. I've been opting to watch Dawson's Creek on Netflix instead of unpacking, so most of our bags are still piled on the floor of our bedroom. We returned home last Thursday morning, and I've only had two showers - maybe three? - since then. (It's even grosser when you consider that our big kids have had a stomach bug this week, so try not to think about that.) Earlier today, I considered going to Wal-Mart to buy more underwear so that I could put off the laundry for another day. Later today, as I rest in bed with my turn with the stomach bug, I'll be catching up on my trashy TV by watching The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All on Hulu (and still not unpacking).
In other words, we're not perfect.
We're just riding this wild ride God set us on in parenting our two homegrown kiddos and our one Taiwanese treasure. Thanks for continuing to pray for us.
bought with the precious blood of Christ
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If you want to skip the introduction below and just jump to our posts related to Christ, click {here}. Otherwise, read on!
Before I write anything else, know this: We don't share our faith here out of superiority or arrogance or obligation. We share our faith for two reasons:
Yes, sin, but our faith isn't about sin, because a faith focused on that would suck. It's not about sin; it's about Christ who frees us from sin. And I am so thankful for that!
To know what we believe, start {here} with our story, which is truly God's story in our lives.
To check out our blog posts that are particularly Christ-focused, go {here}. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end of our faith and of all things. In Christ alone, our hope is found: it's more than the words of a song; it's the truth.
And watch this. It's worth it.
Before I write anything else, know this: We don't share our faith here out of superiority or arrogance or obligation. We share our faith for two reasons:
- because it defines us and we can't separate our lives, family, reading, anything from our faith and
- because we love people - you! - too much to be silent about God.
Yes, sin, but our faith isn't about sin, because a faith focused on that would suck. It's not about sin; it's about Christ who frees us from sin. And I am so thankful for that!
To know what we believe, start {here} with our story, which is truly God's story in our lives.
To check out our blog posts that are particularly Christ-focused, go {here}. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end of our faith and of all things. In Christ alone, our hope is found: it's more than the words of a song; it's the truth.
And watch this. It's worth it.